Each of us lives one life and lets the alternative lives die. It's a constant grieving of what could have been -- other lovers, other teachers, other cliffs, other desk jobs, other cars, other coasts, other sorrows.

Those things that might have been branch out infinitely. You could mourn the infinite branchings if you were so inclined. You could mourn every road not driven, every sip not swallowed, every puff not puffed, every pill not popped, every body not unfolded, every face not kissed, every field not plowed, every shirt not unbuttoned, every suit not tried on, every rain not tasted in the annual tasting of rain, every poem not read by every fireplace not lit, every dream not remembered in every sleep not slept.

You could be at it awhile is what I'm saying, if you chose to mourn it all. You just can't. So you choose the big ones. This was a big one. This was a literal life literally unlived.

The debate is not about abortion. That's another conversation for another bar, later in the evening, with extra crying and recrimination. This debate is about possibilities accepted or declined, and the mourning of the possible. We decline the possible every second, we prevent it in a million ways, we stop it before it begins, we stop it after it begins.

-- Carry Tennis